haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
