when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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