Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
