How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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