Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
and she was petting her beer can
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
