I hate all girls vehemently.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
