It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
