I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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