Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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