we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
