Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
