i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
