how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
