I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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