dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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