You're so nebulous sometimes
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize