I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize