some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize