So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
