My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize