Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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