it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
