Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize