so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
