Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
