can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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