I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I feel like a drive thru vagina
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
