Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
