I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Randomize
