That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
