so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
