omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
