My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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