I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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