I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
