why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Randomize
