worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
