yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize