i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
