she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
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