operation harelip BJ is a go
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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