you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
