You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
