True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize