question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
please come you make the beer taste better
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
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