right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Randomize
