The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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