OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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