You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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