Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
