She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize